17 Things I Learned from My Father:
- Death is coming for us all.
- There are no bad thoughts, only bad actions.
- “Men, watch out: the ladies are coming for your toys.”
- Confidence lets you pull anything off, even Tevas with socks.
- All children are amazing artists. It’s the grown-ups you have to worry about.
- Unhappy at a party? Say you’re going to check on your car, then exit swiftly. Make eye contact with no one.
- Drunk emotions aren’t real emotions.
- A sweet potato prepared in the microwave, then slathered with flaxseed oil, makes for an exceptional snack.
- It’s never too late to learn.
- “The Volvo is bad enough. I’m not putting a coat on the fucking dog.”
- A rising tide lifts all boats.
- That being said, it’s horrible when people you hate get things you want.
- Hitting a creative wall? Take a break from work to watch a procedural. They always solve the case, and so will you.
- You don’t need to be flamboyant in your life to be flamboyant in your work.
- Wear a suit to the DMV to speed things along a bit.
- Do not make jokes about concealing drugs, weapons, or currency in front of police officers or TSA workers. There is nothing funny about being detained.
- It’s all about tailoring.
–Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She’s “Learned” by Lena Dunham.